Enjoy my free resources!

Honoring the Body’s Feedback

A conversation with Stephen Porges, developer of Polyvagal Theory

This interview was part of a series of webinars entitled ‘Supporting Your Nervous System through Motherhood, Midlife and Beyond’, organised by the Polyvagal Institute in October 2024. Learn about the significance of Polyvagal Theory in understanding how our nervous system shapes our experience – in daily life, our relationships and the birth room.

Polyvagal Institute Conference 2022

Read: Polyvagal Principles for Birth and Postpartum in Pathways to Family Wellness Magazine Summer issue

Optimizing the birth process to minimize the trauma experience and foster connection and co-regulation.

“ Co-regulation serves as the language of our nervous systems, facilitating the dynamic interaction necessary for regulating our autonomic nervous systems, particularly the ventral vagal system. In this process, individuals with a more regulated autonomic nervous system support others in regulating theirs, nurturing feelings of safety and tranquility. During the birthing process, co-regulation serves as a tool that engages the nervous systems of both the labor support person and the client. When the doula and the mother have their ventral vagal circuits synchronized…not only is the mother calm and glowing, but so is the doula. ”⁠

Read: Empowered Pushing. 2nd Stage Labor & Your Pelvic Floor in Pathways Family Wellness Magazine Spring 2025 Issue

One of the shortest part of labor—the pushing stage—is the most important when it comes to impact on your body and lasting effects on the pelvic floor.

As a respected New York City birth educator and doula with 21+ years in practice, I have heard versions of this question countless times: How do I get this baby out of me without destroying my vagina?

What I’ve found is that birthing moms are often underprepared for the pushing stage of labor. They may push inefficiently for extended periods of time. This is not without consequence. Unnecessary forceful pushing can be harmful to the perineum, increasing the risk of tearing and the type of pelvic-floor weakness associated with incontinence or prolapse. Uncoordinated pushing during birth can also lead to further weakening and damaging of the abdominal muscles and pelvic floor.

But it doesn’t have to be this way, and it’s been my life’s work, through online childbirth classes and one-on-one coaching, to make this better for pregnant women—to help expecting moms learn how to push safely and effectively and protect their pelvic floor muscles during birth.